Tuesday, October 15, 2013

The value of friendship

There is something that is simple that I have taken for granted the most: friends.  Of course, everyone likes to have friends for entertainment but I am realizing that friends are needed at a different level - survival, especially when you get older and older.  Of course, you can rely on your family for support and that is what I have been doing for all these years - relying on my family for support and not really valuing the true meaning of friendship.

I had this idea that friends were people that you just "hang around with" and shared a common interests.  But now I am getting a different idea of friendship after I lost all my grandparents.  My grandparents are all gone and the ties that my family has have disappeared when all my grandparents had disappeared.  Family is something that I have been valuing too much and the day has come - sooner than I think that all the people in my family has disappeared and the family is not the same anymore.

I had this feeling of loneliness - I am truly independent and my family has been starting to fritter away.  I only have my parents and they are going in their own direction as well.  Without family, I started to have a closer bond with my parents, especially with my mom than ever before.  I had become more attached to my mom because of fear and she wanted some independence.  I had this idea that I could become even closer and closer to the family, and my parents are having enough.  I am not going anywhere and they think I needed social independence.

I did not realize the true meaning of friendship until about now - maybe I have been taking friends for granted.  Friends are not just people you just "hang out" with and have your family - friends are somebody at a different level.  I am starting to have this feeling of loneliness and even my roommates have been going a different direction.  I rely on my parents for support with something that I don't value.

I am starting to realize why we need friends - this is something for survival.  I am starting to realize the value of friendship and friendships are two sided.  I was very one sided with many things, but after a year, I am starting to realize the value of friendship and connections.  Family is not going to do it and a lot of stress is created on the family because of the lack of value of friendship.  It is time for social maturity that I haven't really figured out yet.

When I approached the darker moments of my life, I have realized the reason why people need friends.  We need friends for our survival.  I am starting to realize without the connections, my life would be dangerous.  I need friends not just for entertainment - it might be down to the value of safety and survival.

I have bought a smartphone - not just to fit in but I am realizing the value of this device and having connections and contacts.  They helped me in many ways that I never helped before.  My family  is starting to fritter away and they are going into their directions - I haven't valued this lesson that the people nearby you are here to help you, even though they may not be in the right clique or anything like that.  I have realized that I need people for survival and my loss of connections results in my fear in the world.

I realized that everyone I know is starting to go their own direction, my family was starting to go away, and I have nobody to suck onto.  I needed connections and in this dark lonely world, it is hard to get connections. I underestimated the value that there are people around me.  I started to realize that is hard to survival.

The concept of give and take that keeps friendships going was something I didn't value until I need it.  People need their help and everyone has their own things to help each other.  I had a hard time realizing that other people needed my help as much as I do, and probably more than I do.  It looks like I might have some knowledge and wisdom to actually give some help to other people.

People need help when they are sick for instance and you have a lack of family.  You can suffer or you can actually rely on "friends" to help you when ill.  Lets say a person is stuck in the ditch - a friend could pull you out.  We have services for the "friendless" people but isn't it easier for you to find a friend than to spend some extra money.  You are just simply ridiculed when you use these services because of the lack of friendship.

Some people can survive more without friends - maybe I had the idea that I didn't need friends as much because I have it all figured out but I really didn't - I am dumb.  I did not value the idea of friendship as somebody to help you - my concept was somebody to make me more desirable - I had family to help you.  I did not need many friends.  But now I realized the concept why we need other people - both male and female, for friends.

I am starting to realize - I need to find other people for my survival.

No comments:

Post a Comment