Sunday, July 10, 2011

The year without the best social life

Last year was the year I did not have  the best social life in college.  In fact, I didn't really have that much of a social life at all but I have a feeling that is going to change.  I do understand it is the freshman thing that it is not that easy to make new friends in college, but most of these problems are up to me.

Truth is, I did make a few new friends and things are going good in my classes, but sometimes I felt very lonely.  But I am going to fix this.  Here are some of the reasons why I am not able to have the best social life I expected.

1.  The roommates - the roommates that I have are not the coolest kids.  I was rooming with people that have some borderline mental disabilities, but I only have ADD.  I felt like I didn't fit in so I hid myself in my room.

2.  Hiding  myself in the room - I have been hiding myself in the room too much, which isolated me from the rest of the world.  I should of been of more open and more outgoing to people, and get to know some of the people that live by me.  Being stuck with roommates doesn't mean that I am stuck with certain people.

3.  Driving - I did not have access to a car which means I am confined to the apartment.  What I should of done is tried to get to know the people close by, and be a little bit more friendlier, etc.  But when I do have the ability to drive, I can at least go to the mall or to one of the stores or restaurants, etc.

4.  Not as interested in some people - a lot of people around me may not interest me.  I think it is most likely of a generation gap which was probably was the problem with the roommates the first year I went there.  I did not grow up with Eminem and these other people as much as the older generation, and I haven't grown up with Super Mario, Pokemon, etc.  They also have different values - many were raised in day cares and there is nothing all I can do about this.  But now there may be kids that are raised more at home.  I  also have been in classes where you see older people, which are  on a totally different wavelength as me.

5.  Just simply not trying - I think I was having a passive attitude about things and I don't think I was trying to be friendly with other people.  Maybe I was having an attitude or maybe I don't really have a defined identity.  But I think the thing is  it is boiled down to more my attitude and the other people.  I have been isolating myself too much - people won't bite.

The problem is that I probably made up my mind what I want but I don't think it exists.  The truth is, I don't think I really know what I want.  I probably had a messed up values, but this doesn't matter in college because people are exploring and learning about theirselves when they are taking classes.  I am learning more and more about myself each time I take classes.  With sociology, I may have a better idea of how society works and how I fit  into societies.  With psychology, I have a better idea of what makes people, including myself tick.  With anthropology, I am learning that the college has different lifestyle and  I am learning to appreciate my lifestyle, and  to understand the other people's lifestyle,  I am getting smarter, and next year, I am going to get a more smarter, broader view of the world around me.

But I know the root of my problem is that I may be a little bit too shy, and too much of a stick in the mud, and I need to open up a bit.  I  should have a more open mind and to think more about other people that myself.  I am not trying to hard and I should keep trying.  Just like the classes are opening my mind up, I should open my mind up and to understand how normal I am and how weird the other people are.




 

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