Why I am overfocusing on love

I see people who are in relationships and such and such, but I am starting to realize - why am I over focusing on finding love?  I don't really know why but I think I am looking for someone outside of my family that I can count on.  I don't think I am really valuing a passionate kind of love but I think I am looking for support; probably someone just like mom.  I think I am looking for someone to take care of me - I am a wuss and I don't think the girls want to take care of me; they want me to take care of them.  I am looking for a caregiver and it is a sign of my wussiness.  There has been a lot of rough experiences in my life and I think it is a battle, and I think it is most likely a result of the ADHD symptoms.  I had a feeling that I could not measure up to everyone else  because "I am not there."  Too much anxiety - I am like a piglet who is looking for a pooh to suck on to.  This shows how much of a wuss.

I think it is going to change when I start to get more focused and have a more confident, authoritative, assertive personality.  I think this ADHD is making me more like a weakling because  I am not seeing things the way they are.  I am afraid of everything in this world and I am looking for someone to hold my hand.  I think it has to be the other way around - I am supposed to hold someone else's hand.  It seemed to work out.  I helped carry a box for a girl when she was moving into an apartment - blah, blah, blah.  She walked all over me.  When I started to become Mr. Wuss again, she started to find someone else.  Things has to change.  I should STOP being a piglet looking for a pooh bear; it is not going to work out.   I think I need to start acting a lot more like I know what I am doing and I am supposed to take care of the girl, not the other way around.

What would a girl like about a guy who acts like a weakling?  The girl does not want to be MOM.  Seems like when a girl is kicking my butt things are not working right.  I need to have something that the girl will love about me and he won't love some wussy guy.