It's time to grow up

You know I still want to be a kid, but at the same time I want to grow up too.  I like this feeling of independence; the feeling that you can make your own decisions.  It is kind of fun.  But I sometimes don't want to grow up either.  It is the commitment that I am having a problem with - I am pretty comfortable with this going to school routine, but there are some things I wish I could do.  It would of been nicer if I had my own money and it would of been nice if I have the ability to drive.  I am interested in romantic relationships - actually I don't mind growing up because I like the increase in freedom that I didn't have as a kid.

But we are in a time where we don't have the most freedoms.  I would like to grow up but other people don't like to grow up.  They are very childish and want everything spoonfed.  This is what the welfare system is all about.  It is nice to get a handout, but you don't get as much money as you work for it.  You need to work to contribute to society - there are things to be done and I am trying to find out what my niche is and what I am fit doing to contribute to this society that is falling apart.  It looks like there are more jobs being sent to Chinese people than to Americans which is not good and we are all sitting on our butts.  It is time to grow up.  I want to get a job, but every job I want is taken by some Mexican or some Chinese person who is willing to work.  Too much of this globalization and affirmative action.

We are having a collapsed system in almost everyone and we need people to fix this system.  I think I am actually pretty grown up; it is the other people that are not grown up.  I want to make my own money and I want to contribute to this society.  And I want to raise children and raise them to be good, sucessful children.  I have a feeling that we are in this collapsed system because the people are messed up - it makes me sick.

But anyone it is time for me to grow up and I have some strong values about things - I think it is time for me to find out what I want to do and I haven't decided it yet.  And I better decide quick.