I am interested in this psychology and I had taken a personality test online to find out more about my personality. I am pretty amazed with the results and it may be pretty accurate. I had taken the Big Five, which is a classic personality examination and there is a lot to be learned.
I scored very low on the Extraversion on the big five - which means I am a shy person. I am not the type to attend parties and rather do things such as sit on the internet or listen to my iPod. I think the technology is created a crutch and that is an addiction to shy people. I like people - I am not afraid of people but I don't really care much for the party life.
Consciouness and Agreeableness are in the middle - I tend to be messy, but when I am in a work situation, I can be very uptight and neat. I think the money is the motivator and I think I value giving someone a very good job instead of a half fast. I am pretty agreeable but sometimes I can be disagreeable especially when you have me speak my mind.
I scored very high in openness and that is the gift to my personality. This open mindedness is good which gets me interested in different music, cultures, and lifestyles. I am not a stodgy person and I am thinking about the future, but this is destroyed by the neuroticism I have. I seem to be fearful of things and have anxiety on things, and that is probably influencing my shyness. It is a weird combination indeed since I am open minded but neurotic. I think this neuroticism is the negative part of the right brain - I tend to be dreaming up things that are not there and that is probably because of the creativity. I think the introversion might be the power of my brain - I got many things to look at and think about a long with create things that I express myself differently than actually being a person that is outgoing. But I think I need to start lowering my fear and to stop dreaming up so many things.
Realistically I know most people are good and harmless, and everyone is in all shapes and sizes, but I think I had been affected a lot by some people. It seems like I am not trusting people. I am probably thinking in a higher level than some people and in a more open than other people, which shows some intellect. There are people around me that are like that that tend to be more introverted and creative, and philosophical and they do get into good jobs in the future. But when I start getting away from my dreaminess, I might get to be a different person.
There is something out there for me and possibly a career, and I am starting to find out a career for me.
Wednesday, October 31, 2012
Tuesday, October 30, 2012
What am I going to be like in 2013
2013 is going to be around the corner and if the Mayan things passes through, it might be a pretty good year. I had been optimistic about every year but this year turned out to be a very good year for development indeed. There are some of the leftovers from the 2010-2011 era, such as some of the roommate situations, but for the most part, things had been pretty different.
I had changed a lot from the end of 2011 to the end of 2012 - 2012 was the year where I gotten my first job and started the first glimpse of higher learning. Throughout the summer, it looks like I am starting to get an idenity started and even through this fall, it looks like there is a lot of self improvement in many ways, along with comebacks such as me downloading music. This year reminds me sort of the same situation as 9th grade, when I was working for my grandpa and things are going smoothly. There are traces of high school coming back and not as chaotic as it was in the last 3-4 years.
I had grown up a lot this year but next year I can see there is going to be a continuation of what is going on this year about this fall. I have a feeling that I am going to progress in my Wal Mart job, possibly getting bumped out of the Maintainace position into something with a higher pay and something more enjoyable. The higher pay means I am going to have more options such as trying to find another apartment that is a little bit better. I do like my days of the current apartment I am in but it is time for me to move on.
I am probably going to start developing some new interests and continuing on my old interests. It looks like I do like my cat and I might start developing an interest in pets and animals. Who knows what I am going to buy or get interested in - buying new clothes and iTunes cards might give way to more expensive and more hobby related items when I get a lot more cash.
I also have a feeling that I am going to have a way higher sense of freedom and self esteem - 2013 will be the year where I am going to truly focus on my education for a career. 2012 and 2013 are true transitional years into the adult world and I am going to start becoming more grown up than I was around 2010, which was practically high school for me.
I think I had been in this hiberation state since about the death of my grandma on my mom side but with the death of my grandma on my dads side I am starting to slip out of this hiberation. A lot of this state was transitional and it was a time of thinking and chaos. This was probably one of my more stressful times since elementary school or middle school.
A year from now you probably see a different person but it might be a better person.
I had changed a lot from the end of 2011 to the end of 2012 - 2012 was the year where I gotten my first job and started the first glimpse of higher learning. Throughout the summer, it looks like I am starting to get an idenity started and even through this fall, it looks like there is a lot of self improvement in many ways, along with comebacks such as me downloading music. This year reminds me sort of the same situation as 9th grade, when I was working for my grandpa and things are going smoothly. There are traces of high school coming back and not as chaotic as it was in the last 3-4 years.
I had grown up a lot this year but next year I can see there is going to be a continuation of what is going on this year about this fall. I have a feeling that I am going to progress in my Wal Mart job, possibly getting bumped out of the Maintainace position into something with a higher pay and something more enjoyable. The higher pay means I am going to have more options such as trying to find another apartment that is a little bit better. I do like my days of the current apartment I am in but it is time for me to move on.
I am probably going to start developing some new interests and continuing on my old interests. It looks like I do like my cat and I might start developing an interest in pets and animals. Who knows what I am going to buy or get interested in - buying new clothes and iTunes cards might give way to more expensive and more hobby related items when I get a lot more cash.
I also have a feeling that I am going to have a way higher sense of freedom and self esteem - 2013 will be the year where I am going to truly focus on my education for a career. 2012 and 2013 are true transitional years into the adult world and I am going to start becoming more grown up than I was around 2010, which was practically high school for me.
I think I had been in this hiberation state since about the death of my grandma on my mom side but with the death of my grandma on my dads side I am starting to slip out of this hiberation. A lot of this state was transitional and it was a time of thinking and chaos. This was probably one of my more stressful times since elementary school or middle school.
A year from now you probably see a different person but it might be a better person.
Career evaluation
For the past 3 months or so, I had made some money. For simply working off some steam at Wal Mart, I had made about $1,000 or so, which is about the price of a very good new computer or TV. But there are many wonderful things I can buy with this amount of money.
I seem to cut that money in half with the exception of the iPod investment which is about $200 that I had payed for, but it seems like I had payed for many things to make me a better person.
Eventually this money is going to get higher and higher, and that is going to change me as a person. When I get into the 1,000s and even the 10,000s and 100,000s with money, things start becoming more interesting and the real person of me start to reveal myself.
But when I am starting to make the higher amounts of money, the interests start to change into responsibility and I start doing things that are supposedly more adult than just downloading music and buying new clothes to fit in, and to look more attractive. I start buying things that start becoming functional with everyday life and that is paying for children as well as paying bills.
But eventually, I have to figure out what should I do to obtain this money and it is something - a function that I need to do in this world, and that is a career. I am starting to get educated but eventually I am going to be one of these overeducated hermits that don't have much goals in life and start thinking about things that are too philosophical and far out in nature. Instead of being one of the "finding oneselves" overeducated hipsters, it is time to actually find myself in a different way, by buying stuff and contributing to society.
I had taken a career test and it looks like I have some patterns. I should work eventually to find out what I am good at but I do have a general picture of what I should be doing in life. This is also a time for me to develop some interests on my own and to see what the real person is going to be like.
It looks like I have a lot of high scores in the human interests and mental health - I think I have been taking too much psychology but it seems like I am interested in this mental health and dephichering things - it has turned out to be a hobby just like someone who is interested in web design or art, or fixing up a car.
A lot of the careers are based on hobbies and it seems like the career clusters are based on hobbies. This is something I should look into.
Human service and mental health jobs are one of my interests, but they seem to also stresss me out so I might as well explore other options. I tend to over analyze my own behavior which is making me a person that is a "social perfectionist" and no fun, and I seem to be over critical of other people. It looks like I have an interest in finding a problem and fixing it, and if I don't have anything to fix, I want to stir something up so I can fix it. Even my blogs sound like I am over intellectualizing but really it is some emo blog.
I think I had been exposed to the mental health field and human services, as well as education, too much but there might be a different world I should try to be exposed to. Maybe the retail environment or business environment, or the bank might interest me more. I think my life has been too much of the "emo" world that I need to see a more productive, positive world. It seem to like shopping and stores, and money, so I should try to get more exposed and interested in that. I might seem to be a lot more "normal" and not trying to play "do it yourself" counselor.
Here I go again - this thing looks like a self psychoanalysist of myself and I am starting to sound like a teacher or a counselor, especially in the field of special ed or behavior management, which I am not being paid for. I should actually start getting into business or something practical.
I seem to cut that money in half with the exception of the iPod investment which is about $200 that I had payed for, but it seems like I had payed for many things to make me a better person.
Eventually this money is going to get higher and higher, and that is going to change me as a person. When I get into the 1,000s and even the 10,000s and 100,000s with money, things start becoming more interesting and the real person of me start to reveal myself.
But when I am starting to make the higher amounts of money, the interests start to change into responsibility and I start doing things that are supposedly more adult than just downloading music and buying new clothes to fit in, and to look more attractive. I start buying things that start becoming functional with everyday life and that is paying for children as well as paying bills.
But eventually, I have to figure out what should I do to obtain this money and it is something - a function that I need to do in this world, and that is a career. I am starting to get educated but eventually I am going to be one of these overeducated hermits that don't have much goals in life and start thinking about things that are too philosophical and far out in nature. Instead of being one of the "finding oneselves" overeducated hipsters, it is time to actually find myself in a different way, by buying stuff and contributing to society.
I had taken a career test and it looks like I have some patterns. I should work eventually to find out what I am good at but I do have a general picture of what I should be doing in life. This is also a time for me to develop some interests on my own and to see what the real person is going to be like.
It looks like I have a lot of high scores in the human interests and mental health - I think I have been taking too much psychology but it seems like I am interested in this mental health and dephichering things - it has turned out to be a hobby just like someone who is interested in web design or art, or fixing up a car.
A lot of the careers are based on hobbies and it seems like the career clusters are based on hobbies. This is something I should look into.
Human service and mental health jobs are one of my interests, but they seem to also stresss me out so I might as well explore other options. I tend to over analyze my own behavior which is making me a person that is a "social perfectionist" and no fun, and I seem to be over critical of other people. It looks like I have an interest in finding a problem and fixing it, and if I don't have anything to fix, I want to stir something up so I can fix it. Even my blogs sound like I am over intellectualizing but really it is some emo blog.
I think I had been exposed to the mental health field and human services, as well as education, too much but there might be a different world I should try to be exposed to. Maybe the retail environment or business environment, or the bank might interest me more. I think my life has been too much of the "emo" world that I need to see a more productive, positive world. It seem to like shopping and stores, and money, so I should try to get more exposed and interested in that. I might seem to be a lot more "normal" and not trying to play "do it yourself" counselor.
Here I go again - this thing looks like a self psychoanalysist of myself and I am starting to sound like a teacher or a counselor, especially in the field of special ed or behavior management, which I am not being paid for. I should actually start getting into business or something practical.
Monday, October 29, 2012
The World of Screens
It looks like this world is starting to become a world of screens. It seems like that most of our waking hours, we are exposed to some type of interactive screen or box in some shape or form. It is very rare where you are not exposed to the screen world and not the natural world.
I am part of the "screen addiction" as well and I seen people around, they are looking at screens and interacting with screens. In the modern day of age, most of work involves some type of screen such as a computer or a cell phone, tablet, etc. I am an exception where I have to sweep the floor at Wal Mart, but even with sweeping the floor at Wal Mart involves checking my hours by looking at a screen along with checking the duties for my day. Most of my homework involves a screen and it seems like a lot of my entertainment and social life involves a screen. We are in a screen society and it seems like we are starting to get pretty weird with this "screen" world.
I listen to music on a iPod which uses a screen and some headphones, I am typing this blog on a computer which involves a screen, and I am probably going to do other activities such as watch TV with a screen. There are very few times where I am not exposed to the screen world and it seems like I am now attached to the screen world again.
I have a feeling that the screen world is an escape from reality. We don't want to see what is in front of us or even interact with things in front of us, so we depend on the screen. The internet is the place to do just about anything and it is an endless supply of information, games, cats, and dirty pictures. But it seems like I am attached to that screen.
The screen is stimulation and you don't have to have anything in the room to stimulate. You can sit in a empty room and then be exposed to some world with a box. We are exposed to the technological world at a very young age and it seems like most of technology is confined to a screen.
We are not in the world - we are in our own worlds and it seems like this might even confine with the new dimension we are entering, according to the Mayans. It looks like we are starting to have an addiction to screen and that addiction is starting to increase more and more. Welcome to the screen world.
I am part of the "screen addiction" as well and I seen people around, they are looking at screens and interacting with screens. In the modern day of age, most of work involves some type of screen such as a computer or a cell phone, tablet, etc. I am an exception where I have to sweep the floor at Wal Mart, but even with sweeping the floor at Wal Mart involves checking my hours by looking at a screen along with checking the duties for my day. Most of my homework involves a screen and it seems like a lot of my entertainment and social life involves a screen. We are in a screen society and it seems like we are starting to get pretty weird with this "screen" world.
I listen to music on a iPod which uses a screen and some headphones, I am typing this blog on a computer which involves a screen, and I am probably going to do other activities such as watch TV with a screen. There are very few times where I am not exposed to the screen world and it seems like I am now attached to the screen world again.
I have a feeling that the screen world is an escape from reality. We don't want to see what is in front of us or even interact with things in front of us, so we depend on the screen. The internet is the place to do just about anything and it is an endless supply of information, games, cats, and dirty pictures. But it seems like I am attached to that screen.
The screen is stimulation and you don't have to have anything in the room to stimulate. You can sit in a empty room and then be exposed to some world with a box. We are exposed to the technological world at a very young age and it seems like most of technology is confined to a screen.
We are not in the world - we are in our own worlds and it seems like this might even confine with the new dimension we are entering, according to the Mayans. It looks like we are starting to have an addiction to screen and that addiction is starting to increase more and more. Welcome to the screen world.
Fads of the 2010s
I have been looking at fads from the '90s, which many of them I don't even remember. I was a little kid and I thought the '90s were pretty boring. We had a lot of Disney movies, and it was cool to have those light up sneakers, but it was nothing really to write home about.
But I am thinking about - the '10s. The '10s is starting out in a mess and we are in global chaos along with a economic recession along with unrest in the Middle East, and China is starting to become more powerful. This has been going on since the 1990s but we seem to have our head up our butt.
But the '10s might be a pretty fun decade and I am pretty optimistic about this decade. By about 2019, things are going to be pretty peaceful - I think the world is going to be the most peaceful it even has been and it might be partway because of the 2012 prophecies. The Mayans had predicted great doom or just a pretty peaceful, spiritual enlightement and it looks we are going towards that path of an actually more peaceful, better world. I can see people are going to start accepting things the way they are and start to appreciate things the way they have it.
The '10s had already have many fads and I can see it is going to be fun - the economy is going to rise and everything is going to be awesome.
Here are some that I am noticing:
1. The Return of Teen Pop - We used to have Hilary Duff - that's about it and Miley Cyrus - that's about it. Maybe Aly & AJ to put in the side, but they had not been that glamorized. Now we have Justin Beiber, Selena Gomez, Taylor Swift, One Direction, etc. But really, they are starting to age and become adults as well but it looks like there is actually someone clean to drool over a bedroom wall with than some sleazy old rapper or Korn.
2. Tebowing - this is something that is going extreme in the NFL but I can see it is a fad. I think it is a start from Homer Simpson from one of The Simpsons episodes where he prays in the middle of everything to get what he requested. But it is involving to stop in the middle of everything and praying, which is sort of a spiritual enlightenment coming.
3. American Pickers - this show and "picking" has been the rage, especially with the ecomony. You like to deal a bunch of junk and get some money off of it.
4. Angry Birds - this game is from Finland and that has been a faddish thing. It is a game that you can play on smartphones and other mobile devices with a touchscreen where you slingshot a bird with a bunch of pigs. I had played that game and it is pretty fun, and addicting. lol
5. Some internet fads - the internet, especially with the technology addicted generation, is starting to create many memes and fads, such as the Nyan Cat and the Double rainbow jokes.
6. SmartTV and internetTV - this is something that might be a trend, now a fad. The TV has turned into a bunch of garbage but we got Hulu where you can watch some quality TV worth watching, anytime day and night. And YouTubeland is a place where you can dig up some things with your interests.
7. Dubstep - this is something that focuses on the "contrabass subsonic" sounds of some synth lead and it has a wobble, but certain people are dancing around in this new form of electronic music.
8. The Tea Party Movement and The Wall Street Protestors - we have been having political movements in rebellion to political ways of life. The Tea Party movement wants to go back to our Americana roots of the Wild Wild West and the Wall Street Protestors want to have some type of utopia that was fantasized in the 60s. It looks like there is a lot of arguining and nothing seems to be getting anywhere, and there are differerent philosophies on things on that issues, most likely on what is causing the recession.
9. Americana comeback - This is something that is going with the more alternative rock and country music - we want to go back to a time when things were good and we are trying to have a culture. Country music is starting to become more mainstream, and I can see in the future we are going to have a comeback of jug bands and barn dances.
10. Girls are prettier - the girl wearing the dress is a head turner along with some more traditionalist fashions. We are getting sick of the sloppy look of the 1990s and 2000s where we are finally going to have some fashion, and girls are actually very pretty now with some of the stuff they are wearing.
But I am thinking about - the '10s. The '10s is starting out in a mess and we are in global chaos along with a economic recession along with unrest in the Middle East, and China is starting to become more powerful. This has been going on since the 1990s but we seem to have our head up our butt.
But the '10s might be a pretty fun decade and I am pretty optimistic about this decade. By about 2019, things are going to be pretty peaceful - I think the world is going to be the most peaceful it even has been and it might be partway because of the 2012 prophecies. The Mayans had predicted great doom or just a pretty peaceful, spiritual enlightement and it looks we are going towards that path of an actually more peaceful, better world. I can see people are going to start accepting things the way they are and start to appreciate things the way they have it.
The '10s had already have many fads and I can see it is going to be fun - the economy is going to rise and everything is going to be awesome.
Here are some that I am noticing:
1. The Return of Teen Pop - We used to have Hilary Duff - that's about it and Miley Cyrus - that's about it. Maybe Aly & AJ to put in the side, but they had not been that glamorized. Now we have Justin Beiber, Selena Gomez, Taylor Swift, One Direction, etc. But really, they are starting to age and become adults as well but it looks like there is actually someone clean to drool over a bedroom wall with than some sleazy old rapper or Korn.
2. Tebowing - this is something that is going extreme in the NFL but I can see it is a fad. I think it is a start from Homer Simpson from one of The Simpsons episodes where he prays in the middle of everything to get what he requested. But it is involving to stop in the middle of everything and praying, which is sort of a spiritual enlightenment coming.
3. American Pickers - this show and "picking" has been the rage, especially with the ecomony. You like to deal a bunch of junk and get some money off of it.
4. Angry Birds - this game is from Finland and that has been a faddish thing. It is a game that you can play on smartphones and other mobile devices with a touchscreen where you slingshot a bird with a bunch of pigs. I had played that game and it is pretty fun, and addicting. lol
5. Some internet fads - the internet, especially with the technology addicted generation, is starting to create many memes and fads, such as the Nyan Cat and the Double rainbow jokes.
6. SmartTV and internetTV - this is something that might be a trend, now a fad. The TV has turned into a bunch of garbage but we got Hulu where you can watch some quality TV worth watching, anytime day and night. And YouTubeland is a place where you can dig up some things with your interests.
7. Dubstep - this is something that focuses on the "contrabass subsonic" sounds of some synth lead and it has a wobble, but certain people are dancing around in this new form of electronic music.
8. The Tea Party Movement and The Wall Street Protestors - we have been having political movements in rebellion to political ways of life. The Tea Party movement wants to go back to our Americana roots of the Wild Wild West and the Wall Street Protestors want to have some type of utopia that was fantasized in the 60s. It looks like there is a lot of arguining and nothing seems to be getting anywhere, and there are differerent philosophies on things on that issues, most likely on what is causing the recession.
9. Americana comeback - This is something that is going with the more alternative rock and country music - we want to go back to a time when things were good and we are trying to have a culture. Country music is starting to become more mainstream, and I can see in the future we are going to have a comeback of jug bands and barn dances.
10. Girls are prettier - the girl wearing the dress is a head turner along with some more traditionalist fashions. We are getting sick of the sloppy look of the 1990s and 2000s where we are finally going to have some fashion, and girls are actually very pretty now with some of the stuff they are wearing.
Wednesday, October 3, 2012
The transition is coming
It looks like it is finally dawning on me while I am registering for my classes. What's next? It looks like I have been in the habit of going to school so long that I don't know how to react. What am I going to do next? It is a scary thought that time is pressing on before I know it and I need to get going. I really don't know what really to do next, and I need to have a significant path.
I am working at Wal Mart and I am not sure if this is going to be a temporary flavor of the week or it might be a lifelong career. I doubt I am going to have that commitment, and I think I am not worried about planning a lifelong career. Only God will know what I am going to do, but I think I need to grow up and get motivated.
It looks like I do have direction in life but I just think things are working out just fine right now. I am in a routine and I seem to not want to move forward. But eventually the routine might be boring and it might be a failed routine. I really don't know where I am going and what I am doing, but eventually someday it is going to catch up. And I don't care. But at least, I am just going to go with the natural biological desire to have a family, etc, but in this world, money is good.
I don't think I realize the value of money yet, but I notice that this "money" thing could "buy things" such as an iPod. I really like my iPod and I am proud of spending every penny on it. Nobody raked in anything. This paycheck is pretty awesome when I get it. But I don't realize the value of it but there are many things that I can buy with that paycheck. But the iPod is a start and I think I can buy something more, but I don't really have an significant plan of what I want and what I don't want. I am still trying to figure out who I am and what makes me tick, but the money situation is helping.
I am 21 years old, but I haven't really have the "adult" feeling yet. I think it is time for me to figure out what is "me" in the year 2020 or 2030 or even in the year 2050. Far into the future, when I am lying on my deathbed, I think I need to figure out what did I left behind. What am I alive for?
I think I need to shape up and have a direction. Okay, I clean toilets and sweep floors, and clean up the parking lot. Okay, that sounds like chores but it is a store. At least I can clean for crying out loud! But I find this awesome when I get magical things such as iPods so I can download music and the power of just buying something when I see something good. I think I need to have a goal or something like that, and Jesus, maybe you should help me find me that goal. I need to have a purpose - a destination. I need to know why I am here. I am here for a reason and I have the right genetic code, the right disposition and location at the right time and place for me to be here. I want to know why?
I value family and relationships very important, but it seems like I need to have something to get me here. I am not looking for fame or fortune or anything like that, but I think I want something that gives me a sense of purpose and makes me feel good about myself.
I am working at Wal Mart and I am not sure if this is going to be a temporary flavor of the week or it might be a lifelong career. I doubt I am going to have that commitment, and I think I am not worried about planning a lifelong career. Only God will know what I am going to do, but I think I need to grow up and get motivated.
It looks like I do have direction in life but I just think things are working out just fine right now. I am in a routine and I seem to not want to move forward. But eventually the routine might be boring and it might be a failed routine. I really don't know where I am going and what I am doing, but eventually someday it is going to catch up. And I don't care. But at least, I am just going to go with the natural biological desire to have a family, etc, but in this world, money is good.
I don't think I realize the value of money yet, but I notice that this "money" thing could "buy things" such as an iPod. I really like my iPod and I am proud of spending every penny on it. Nobody raked in anything. This paycheck is pretty awesome when I get it. But I don't realize the value of it but there are many things that I can buy with that paycheck. But the iPod is a start and I think I can buy something more, but I don't really have an significant plan of what I want and what I don't want. I am still trying to figure out who I am and what makes me tick, but the money situation is helping.
I am 21 years old, but I haven't really have the "adult" feeling yet. I think it is time for me to figure out what is "me" in the year 2020 or 2030 or even in the year 2050. Far into the future, when I am lying on my deathbed, I think I need to figure out what did I left behind. What am I alive for?
I think I need to shape up and have a direction. Okay, I clean toilets and sweep floors, and clean up the parking lot. Okay, that sounds like chores but it is a store. At least I can clean for crying out loud! But I find this awesome when I get magical things such as iPods so I can download music and the power of just buying something when I see something good. I think I need to have a goal or something like that, and Jesus, maybe you should help me find me that goal. I need to have a purpose - a destination. I need to know why I am here. I am here for a reason and I have the right genetic code, the right disposition and location at the right time and place for me to be here. I want to know why?
I value family and relationships very important, but it seems like I need to have something to get me here. I am not looking for fame or fortune or anything like that, but I think I want something that gives me a sense of purpose and makes me feel good about myself.
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