This is not going to be my last year in life but it is going to be the last year of my college ages. You never know, I am most likely going to be going back to college in the future and I am going to be going into non-traditional status, and I am most likely going to have a different attitude about college. I always thought the non-traditional adult students were "not cool" and in the way, but actually they might be the louder and more fun people in college than the "traditional" college students who are worried about fitting in and partying, and not serious about going there.
But it looks like my time in college is starting to wind down and it looks like I am starting to look back in the past, close the book, and try to move forward. It took a while, but it looks like I am starting to get with the "core" of the problem of why many things in my life are getting screwed up and not getting all the things I want.
I had made progress but I had not made progress. My personality has changed a lot and I had stayed the same. I am naturally starting to be more intelligent and more mature; of course after about 4-5 years of college, you are going to be more intelligent and mature, and I am going to start to become ready to take on the world.
This year is going to be the nitty gritty, finally the meat and potatoes for college and finally going to learn something for a career. I had not become career minded since career means I have to grow up, but I do want to grow up in some ways. I must be this guy that wants a girlfriend and all the cool growing up things without going through the meat and potatoes of growing up - I want the easy way out. Now I am starting to realize I need to start getting to the core - I am 22 years old and it is time to get moving.
Relationships and dating interest me; it is about time and it was something I valued I high school but I never seem to have a girlfriend. I can't seem to figure out why but I think it might be just not growing up and taking responsibility. There is a lot of responsibility with dating and relationships, and I think I need to become a more grown up man, and not some whiny kid that hasn't grown past 14. It takes a while to face responsibility and it might be the things that are keeping me from getting girls. I have to dress decent, act decent - simply grow up. I could be sentimental and sometimes want to go back to my childhood but I think it is about time for me to get my act together. Women are more than a sex object and I know that.
There are girls all over the place and it looks like I don't have the confidence to ask any of them out. Maybe I don't have the time and I am not sure if they are taken or not. A lot of girls are taken and I do have this fear of rejection. But I am starting to take some important steps to actually being on the road to getting girls. It looks like the girls and the relationships might be something that motivate me to grow up, and I like to get good girls; not the ugly girls.
I think I might actually have some hope some day and Lord I hope I get some hope. I don't want to be this dud loser guy that can't get any girls - I want to be a different person and there are many opportunities but it looks like I never take them.
Sunday, June 9, 2013
Tuesday, June 4, 2013
The world has changed a lot
Of course, I haven't been living with the cutting edge of modern technology, but I had noticed a significant change in the way things are. 2006 and 2007, and even 2008 seems old and outdated - the ideas and everything from that time seems like yesterday.
The 2010s decade is when there was not much of the gap with the internet - social networking sites have been the mainstream thing and not just a teenage rebellion. There must be a new things that teenagers are rebelling against and I don't think it is the technology. Older people are starting to take over Facebook - Facebook is a very adult site and it has become very business-like, and not a teen hangout. I notice there are more 40-50 year old adults on Facebook than teenagers and college age students. Facebook was some weird college only site about 2005-2006; now it has turned into a standard way of communication and it has become the "established" social networking site.
YouTube has changed as well - it has become a lot like TV and not just a place to upload weird videos of teenagers doing pranks. YouTube has become the place where you can watch videos - any video you want and the videos have become even part of our pop culture. There are some leftovers of the weird videos but most of the videos now are professionally created and marketed, and a lot of them have even TV advertisements; so YouTube has become very commercialized.
The change has snuck up on me - there was a time I was still using a relatively slow connection and I was even using a desktop computer. I wasn't sitting in my own bedroom using the internet and most of the time on the internet was used viewing sites such as Quizilla. I was not using much media on the web and I haven't been watching that much TV. I heard of the concept of internet TV, but now I can watch a full length movie or TV series off of Netflix the same time I am looking at this blog.
I always thought that 256 MB of RAM and even 512 MB of RAM was huge back in high school. Then about 2009 the standard has become about 1 GB and by about now, 4 GB and even 8 GB are the standard amounts of RAM that you need in a computer. Eventually, we'll need about 16 GB by about the end of this decade with 1-2 TB hard drives. That is a major change. But even with the 1 TB hard drive; I'll probably never get past about maybe 50 GB if I am lucky or even about 20 GB, unless I am a hardcore gamer.
Technology has changed a lot and I think there was a shift in the society and culture. Teenagers are not wearing labels anymore and it is not cool to wear ripped jeans anymore. Old stereotypes such as emo and gangsta are not cool, and then eventually is more cool to be nerd, preppy, hipster, or redneck. Redneck wasn't something that was cool but not it is an "in" thing. People had started to become more thrifty and conservative, and along with more conformist. I seen things changing so rapidly that I am having a hard time catching up.
There is even more change in my personal life coming up - I am working and I am going to finish my schooling, and I am going to enter the dreaded "real world." I think I am getting a sample of the real world which will be a change that will seem to sneak up on me. I am not used to the idea that my friends are going my own direction and I am not used to even older adults are starting to respect me as a member of the community and not just a pipsqueak kid. Times are changing.
The 2010s decade is when there was not much of the gap with the internet - social networking sites have been the mainstream thing and not just a teenage rebellion. There must be a new things that teenagers are rebelling against and I don't think it is the technology. Older people are starting to take over Facebook - Facebook is a very adult site and it has become very business-like, and not a teen hangout. I notice there are more 40-50 year old adults on Facebook than teenagers and college age students. Facebook was some weird college only site about 2005-2006; now it has turned into a standard way of communication and it has become the "established" social networking site.
YouTube has changed as well - it has become a lot like TV and not just a place to upload weird videos of teenagers doing pranks. YouTube has become the place where you can watch videos - any video you want and the videos have become even part of our pop culture. There are some leftovers of the weird videos but most of the videos now are professionally created and marketed, and a lot of them have even TV advertisements; so YouTube has become very commercialized.
The change has snuck up on me - there was a time I was still using a relatively slow connection and I was even using a desktop computer. I wasn't sitting in my own bedroom using the internet and most of the time on the internet was used viewing sites such as Quizilla. I was not using much media on the web and I haven't been watching that much TV. I heard of the concept of internet TV, but now I can watch a full length movie or TV series off of Netflix the same time I am looking at this blog.
I always thought that 256 MB of RAM and even 512 MB of RAM was huge back in high school. Then about 2009 the standard has become about 1 GB and by about now, 4 GB and even 8 GB are the standard amounts of RAM that you need in a computer. Eventually, we'll need about 16 GB by about the end of this decade with 1-2 TB hard drives. That is a major change. But even with the 1 TB hard drive; I'll probably never get past about maybe 50 GB if I am lucky or even about 20 GB, unless I am a hardcore gamer.
Technology has changed a lot and I think there was a shift in the society and culture. Teenagers are not wearing labels anymore and it is not cool to wear ripped jeans anymore. Old stereotypes such as emo and gangsta are not cool, and then eventually is more cool to be nerd, preppy, hipster, or redneck. Redneck wasn't something that was cool but not it is an "in" thing. People had started to become more thrifty and conservative, and along with more conformist. I seen things changing so rapidly that I am having a hard time catching up.
There is even more change in my personal life coming up - I am working and I am going to finish my schooling, and I am going to enter the dreaded "real world." I think I am getting a sample of the real world which will be a change that will seem to sneak up on me. I am not used to the idea that my friends are going my own direction and I am not used to even older adults are starting to respect me as a member of the community and not just a pipsqueak kid. Times are changing.
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